Fear My Rubber Chicken

Never take a rubber chicken to work. Especially if you work in a large blue chip organisation.

The rubber chicken is the ultimate mascot for anything comedic (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rubber_chicken). It represents being light hearted and not taking life seriously. You will find similar artifacts on the desks of most people who work in our offices like teddy bears, novelty toys and speaking cop cookie jars. I knew a guy who worked at the Head Office of one of the UK's top brands. At one point in the 90s this firm turned over 1 billion quid. Unfortunately, goods things don't last forever, which meant the inevitable series of tinkering around the edges org restructures. To lighten the mood my friend had a rubber chicken on his desk. However, in the spirit of the 'clearview bluesky thinking out the box strategic culture paradigm of inflection' initiative to recapture the company's spirit for success he was asked to remove it. Now, I'm all for change particularly change that changes leadership at the local level. The problem is that in times of corporate chaos you end up with little dictators in middle management fearful for the jobs. This particular manager's gripe was the rubber chicken on the desk. Negotiations were started to retain the presence of the rubber chicken in parallel with discussions about the waves of redundancies . The main argument to retain the services of the rubber chicken was that you could poor tequila into its back back passage, spread its legs and use the chicken in a drinking game. You know the ones you play when everyone in the IT department is hanging around late at night to see if a program works. (Other uses of the hole in the rubber chicken can be viewed @ http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NRGT34ORavw&feature=related). Regrettably, negotiations stalled and the power of the HR department was brought to bear. The counter argument from senior management was on the grounds of Health & Safety and efficiency as part of a clear desk policy. Union representation then intervened. A letter was written to HR demanding to know where in the employee contract it is was stated that a rubber chicken could not be present on the employee desk. HR then sort legal advice. The legal department had the rubber in the chicken tested for harmful chemicals. There were indeed small traces of hazardous
compounds, which could pose a theoretical environmental risk in the office. At a staff meeting with senior management and a board member to talk about the redundancy process the issue regarding the rubber chicken was on the agenda. Upon hearing about the rubber chicken the board member burst into laughter and said they had a rubber rat on their desk. Apparently, if you squeezed its balls it made a growling noise.

Watch the terror as 2 up and coming middle managers and a representative from the HR department with more time than sense encounter a rubber chicken.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BzCSlpc_c0Y&feature=related